Pisces key word : I believe



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I never thought I might experience this, but I knew it, it was there outside, standing at my doorstep, knocking,,, I decided to ignore, I decided to hold on, I realized carefully and patently, how easier it is now to let go, where back in time I couldn't bear the idea , but the strings that attached my heart, got really tired, the chains that used to tie friendships by all meaning of innocent love, with no conditional efforts, the soulful friendship chains become loose, rotten, dark, rusty enough to be broken, I regret, though I hate to admit this, the five years of my life, the five years wasted on lies, now I can say trusting people is a matter of insanity, human beings are destructive, evil and self loving creatures, I lost my trust in all the meanings of friendship, love, good deeds done by others, I only can see now, is the negative nature is a only  a reflection of human beings thoughts, I only trust God, nature, myself, at least the three of those, promised some...
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I am lost in life somehow

There are too many things I am capable of doing, But I really cant seem to get any done, I do not even try, I believe I have depression, not a severe case, but at least I know I took some of the genes ( unfortunately ) from my father who seems to have it to a very complicated and severe case, I don’t know if this is the crisis of 20’s, or its only something I suffer from, I cant seem to find a path, its all blurry and dark, I am always confused and indecisive whether I want this or I don’t. I wake up everyday feeling useless, my mind is always a blank, I sip my morning coffee and think about the outfit of the day for work, nothing interesting or exciting, just boring routine every single day, and each time I want to quit smoking I find myself more indulged into the idea of dying early, I already have nothing and no one to cling on, I have a gift I do not use, or to be more precise I am not inspired enough to use it. I am out of ideas, and there is where I hit rock bottom. I am curren...
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Its no harm, trust me I wish I can spill my ink inside your cold and hot heart, you had got me lost into a maze of thoughts that I cant myself escape from, my head gets easily tipsy; drunken on the though of you, my blood rushes through my veins and blossoms on my white cheeks flushing like roses, My coffee tastes nothing but your bitter-sweet pheromones. I longed to see the drunken texts from you a little bit more of a longed conversation struck between us , your sober words you speak drunkenly, and if you've ever been high, I will await those words to be spilled out of your bloody lips, your wicked cheeky game you play, I want to know it all. I just want you to tell me all of this.” — Eva .S
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